Weekly Quotes With Dr. K

A real gold mine this week:

#1:
K:"I'm surprised I'm not sick more often...I have to spend all my time with a bunch of walking piles of disease like you guys."

Student: "You probably got it from your kids (meaning his children."

K: "That used to happen, but...I beat the shit out of them, so it's not really a problem anymore."

#2:
"I'm real sick guys...I just went to the bathroom and, well, I don't want to go into the details, but I feel like shit...I'm sorry, I'm sorry...I'm just swearing like this because I have a fever."

#3:
K: "Now when you get your papers back you'll notice...ok, well in psychology when you write papers, by the way a psychology paper is just common sense plus mutli-syllable words...anyway, they talk about positive strokes and negative strokes. Positive strokes are like 'good point', 'you did that well,' and so on. Negative strokes are you know...you need to work on this or you forgot that or whatever. I don't do positive strokes. I just tell you why you messed up. If you need those positive strokes just stay after class and I'll stroke you for 10 minutes."

Student (who had him last semester): [laughs a little too loud]

K: Yeah, just ask that guy, he knows all about it.

Student: Oh, I'm married... I know all about stroking.

Class: ??