Good Comedy

Here is a sneak peek of the conversation that will go on between Ted Tollner and Jim Hostler this weekend in Arizona.

• Hostler: Ted, it’s 3rd and 9 at our own 9. I’m thinking we run a shotgun draw with Moran Norris.
• Tollner: Interesting, but I notice Brian Gilmore hasn’t seen any action yet. Let’s run the wide receiver screen pass here.
• Hostler: Good call. I’m glad you’re here.

(3 minutes later)

• Tollner: Okay the defense just gave up seven and with Hicks returning we should have the ball at our own 30. So what is your next play.
• Hostler: Frank up the middle.
• Tollner: Couldn’t have said it better.
• Hostler: Okay 2nd and 9. I’m thinking a reverse to Gilmore.
• Tollner: Go for it. I really like Gilmore and if he could have escaped those 7 defenders in the backfield last series he could have scored.
• Hostler: Damn, I thought he was gonna break it.
• Tollner: Can’t win them all. Okay it’s now 3rd and 17. What do you think?
• Hostler: I’m thinking a shotgun draw to Maurice Hicks. I really believe we’ll fool the defense and pick up at least 7 yards. That will give Andy Lee the opportunity to put it inside the 20.
• Tollner: Yes, gotta think about your Pro Bowl punter…we really need to pad his stats.

(7 minutes later)

• Hostler: Cool, the defense held them to 3. I’m thinking right out of the gates a run up the middle with Frank
• Tollner: How about the deep ball to Jackson, he is steady and has great hands.
• Hostler: Will do. This should be automatic seven.
• Tollner: Crap, he dropped it. Sun must have been in his eyes. 2nd and 10. I’d pass to Vernon Davis here.
• Hostler: I don’t know. I like it when Davis blocks. Yes he has the ability to break open a play, but he serves us better as a blocker. I was thinking of a screen pass to Gore.
• Tollner: You’re right, call it in.
• Hostler: Damn, false start. 2nd and 20. Shotgun draw again?
• Tollner: Yes.
• Hostler: Tough break, but hey Gore got at least 10.
• Tollner: We got them right where we want them. 3rd and 10. Let’s throw a 6 yard out to Battle. He should be able to pick up the other 4.